MEMBER SPOTLIGHT
Don Palmer & Greg Enas
Young Greg Enas could feel the stares of his neighbors as he walked three blocks to church in his starched white shirt in Berkeley, California, back in the early 60s. Though it was a time of “free love,” the community in which he lived held little love for anything Christ related.
“We stood out like sore thumbs” walking to church, Greg said. But those same kids who stared him down eagerly joined his mom’s child evangelism club because she loved them so well in the name of Jesus.
“And those boys loved our family, even though the culture around us was pretty wild,” he said.
More than half-way across the country in Indianapolis, Indiana, young Don Palmer biked back and forth to school stopping by his grandma’s house on the way home to enjoy warm cookies and milk. “It made for a good stop,” he said, “and it was great for our relationship.”
“My Christian background would be much different than Greg’s,” he said. Though Don’s family members were devout Christians who took to him church and fervently prayed, they didn’t talk a lot about Jesus. “[Faith] just wasn’t really resonating with me,” he said. “[My cousin] David and I would be laughing and writing each other notes and cartoons” during prayer time, he remembered.
As a college student at Purdue, however, Don came to know Jesus through Young Life, which deepened his desire to love well and be loved in return.
Eli Lilly brought Greg to the Midwest to serve as a senior statistician in January of 1982. When Don and Greg, both young and single, met at a Bible study through a mutual friend in 1983 at Don's house, they couldn’t have imagined the trajectory their lives would take and the close-knit friendship they have today.
Don, then chairman and president of Palmer Automotive, invited Greg into a mentoring situation with KIPP (Knowledge is Power Program) schools that forged their relationship. Around the same time, Don and a few other mutual friends covenanted to do life together. Greg and Don solidified their life adventure in this group of men, where Greg remembered his younger days when religion was frowned upon in his community. “God brought us together with this sense of ‘we need some men to walk with,’” Greg said. Hence, Citizen 7 was born with a goal of fostering a sense of belonging where every man feels valued, understood, and connected.
Over the years, both men have been influenced to be men of faith by their fathers. “My father suffered from PTSD coming out of infantry and World War II,” Greg said. “He never talked much about those traumatic experiences, but over time he opened up.” As the oldest of six kids, Greg “got the brunt of a kind man who periodically was given to fits of nervousness, anxiety, and very infrequent but surprising bits of anger. Not intentional, but just outside of his control,” he said. “My father, though, was the best man in my wedding because he is truly the most influential man in my life,” Greg said.
When Greg went away to college at 18, time and distance allowed him and his dad to become even better friends. Over the years, their relationship grew significantly as Greg’s dad moved to Muncie in the late 90's and spent the last years of his life close by. His father had by then become a great counselor, friend and advisor. “He shaped my life in so many ways, Greg said. “As a faith-filled father, husband and employee.”
Likewise, Don’s father influenced him to be the man he has become. “I never remember really talking to him about faith things, but he was probably the most faithful person I knew,” Don said. “He lived way below his means and always treated everyone with great respect. He was a man of his word.” Don’s grandfather who lived two blocks away also shaped him. Since Don’s dad was in retail, he worked a lot, so Don spent many days with his granddad.
“My grandfather was kind of a surrogate dad to me,” Don said. “He was the guy who was throwing the baseball with me, taking me to my practices. He was a great man of faith and a great man of positivity.” Don’s grandparents modeled hospitality to him. “After Sunday church,” he said, “there was always a stranger at the table.” His grandfather gave the sense that “it's not just your tribe; it's a larger tribe.” And Don invites people into his life according to that principle.
Throughout their lives, Don and Greg have laid the groundwork to help men build closer relationships and find purpose in something bigger than themselves. They’ve served as board members, advisory council participants, mentors, coaches and entrepreneurs. Don is at his best when he is “working with progressive business owners to support leadership development.” Greg has “recruited and mentored talent that rose to top leadership positions across Eli Lilly.” His work as a volunteer Venture Catalyst has helped people build better enterprises, communities and places so that the world can belong to something bigger than itself.”
Don and Greg take Jesus’ command to love one another seriously. That’s why they formed Citizen 7, a movement they hope catches on and helps Indianapolis become a place known for how people do life together. They seek to build a community of friends who journey together. “Love God by loving your friends, your families, colleagues, and neighbors by learning how to love sacrificially,” Greg said. “Community happens with men just seeking to love others in their city.”
“Don’t wait for someone else to create community,” Don advises. “Ask somebody to go for a beer, for coffee, do whatever. But take the first step.” He believes men are notorious for not initiating relationship building, but also sees taking initiative as half the battle to strengthen bonds.
Don says compounding relationships is much like we think of compounding interest in finances. “To me,” he said, “there's a compound interest in friendships that you just have to continue to invest in people and do it over and over again. And all of a sudden you wake up years later and think, ‘Gosh, I'm really good friends with that person!’ Why? Because you stayed at it and you compounded the relationship.”
In May, Don will have been married 40 years. He has a son, two daughters and seven grandchildren with another on the way. Greg, married for 39 years, has three sons and two grandkids. Even though both Don and Greg have families, they still find time to pour into other men. Both men are committed to giving from their own blessings to those in need.
“We're about creating a sense of gratitude and thankfulness to God for what He's done, for the friendships we have, for the mission that we're on together,” Greg said, “and out of that gratitude, finding something we’re grateful for to give of time, talent and treasure into whatever God calls to invest in, whether it be our families, our neighborhoods, our businesses and churches and beyond. But it's born out of gratitude.” This is the attitude they encourage of those involved in Citizen 7. “The effect of investment born out of gratitude will be this fruit that we're seeking for the city of Indianapolis,” he said. “We come to serve and not be served.”
“I love the quote that says we are the same person five years from now as we are today with the exception of the books we read and the people we meet,” Greg said. Greg and Don are who they are due to their experiences and the people they’ve known and loved, especially one another. Iron has, indeed, sharpened iron.
“I’d like to express my deep love for Don Palmer,” Greg said. “We're about the long run, the long play, giving to each other, experiencing fun and joy and life together.” Both men are about giving support, direction, and connectivity, mentoring and guiding men – young and old, black, brown and white, wealthy or poor – to live in and value relationship as they have done with one another.
Today love and friendship bind the lives of these two men so much so that they are influencing others to form lasting relationships that will make a difference in their hearts and homes. From the starched white shirts of his childhood to a formerly "fly-over", now vibrant Midwestern city, Greg Enas has found a soulmate in Don Palmer, and they both enthusiastically serve a God of love and lasting relationship.
Q & A
What’s your favorite hobby besides work?
Greg: bike riding and reading
Don: playing golf
What’s your favorite place to vacation?
Greg: back home in Northern California with my extended family
Don: Lake Lemon in southern Indiana
What advice would you give to men hoping to form stronger relationships?
Greg: No matter where you are, where God has planted you, love your neighbor as yourself. Who is your neighbor? Determine that and start to love them. The overflow of that love will direct you to others who are on the same journey.
Don: Commit not to be alone, and don’t be afraid to take the first step. Take the initiative to build relationships. And take it to the Lord. Ask Him to bring people into your life that He wants you to build relationships with.
What’s your idea for a better Indy?
Greg: A better Indy is when metro-Indy is known as a very unique, cool, vibrant place where all residents and guests are known and loved, where their love for each other and their built environment permeates how they live, work, and play, filling the city with a palpable joy of the Lord.
Don: A better Indy is when more people care for their friends and neighbors and show it.
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